Assertiveness
Assertiveness is an important communication tool for promoting mental health. This is because it is about communicating your thoughts and feelings to others in a clear and non-aggressive way. Being able to do this helps with relationships, making decisions, problem solving and dealing with conflict. Assertiveness lies in the middle between aggression and passivity and is a skill that can be learnt.
The following may help.
- Plan what you want to say about a situation or issue before you say it.
- Practise speaking assertively either alone or with a friend
- Imagine a recent conflict and think how you could have handled it in a more assertive way.
- Listen to other people and respects their wants, needs and feelings
- Say “yes” or “no” when you mean it.
- Use assertive language such as “I feel” and “I think” rather than aggressive language such as “You always” and “You never”.
- Don’t interrupt the other person when they are talking and try hard to listen and understand their point of view.
- Be aware of your body language: look people in the eye, stand upright, relax your shoulders, breathe normally, relax your face, don’t shout or whisper.
- Try not to let people goad you into arguing; say you will take the matter up again when they are calmer.
